Hi, I’m Ruthie.
Divorce was never part of the plan. In fact, most of my life, I didn’t believe in it. And if you told me I would be an expert on custody battles?Â
“You have the wrong girl.”
In 2019, I threw some essentials (see: a giant stuffed tiger & my breast pump) into the car and left with my three daughters. I was terrified.Â
The years leading up to this moment were filled with desperate attempts to stay together, if only for the girls. I pretended like we had the perfect marriage–and never told anyone about what was happening behind closed doors.Â
That rainy November day, I decided I believed in divorce. I packed the car and left.
Enter: 28 months of brutal litigation.
My ex-husband hired a bulldog of a lawyer who constantly ambushed me with motions and court appearances. She subpoenaed 8 years of my counseling records–and eventually got them. She hired an “expert” who testified in court that my ex really was just reacting to my actions and shouldn’t be held accountable. She turned the court-appointed attorney for the girls (GAL) against me.
Fighting for custody of my three daughters felt like a nightmare, one where held my breath waiting for the next false accusation or email from my lawyer. I couldn’t eat; I didn’t sleep. I couldn’t imagine life after the custody battle, like I was stuck in a thick fog.Â
Even though I had a mountain of evidence, it still took a 6-day trial and more than $100,000 in legal fees to prove it was in my girls’ best interest to live with me.
My plan was to continue working in corporate America and find my new normal with my three best girls. But something shocked me.
I started meeting other parents who had also been through a custody battle.
I heard story after story of abusive, neglectful, and addicted parents winning custody. There were men with a record of violence, men with child porn on their computers, women with severe alcoholism and neglect taking care of their children. One woman spent over $400,000 against an ex with a felony and he still has the children every other week. One friend was blindsided with false allegations in divorce papers that eventually his ex-wife used to take custody away from him.Â
How does this happen? Why did the Judges in these cases rule in that way? Where did these parents go wrong?Â
These questions haunted me. But I also realized I knew the answers.Â
Through a terrifying leap of faith, I created Winning Your Custody Battle. I believe you deserve an affordable way to navigate the most excruciating time in your life. Your kids deserve to grow up in a home where they are loved, where they feel safe, and where they belong.Â
The parent with the most money and the best lawyer typically wins. And I'm here, my mission, is to change that reality.Â
When I am not helping good parents survive the courtroom, I spend as much time outside with my three daughters as possible. We call Nashville home.
I’m sorry we met under these circumstances, but I am honored you are here. We’ll get through this together.
